sad panda tie owner

Thanks to Jennifer K., class of '11, and to the someone somewhere who is very, very sad to have donated their panda tie to Goodwill.

how sweet it is

At long last, a new tacky tie: a polyester wonder donated by Kristyn Ross.



The absurdist pattern--truly the Hershey corporation's greatest work--got rave reviews all Tuesday long.

triptych

Over a month ago I hoped things at school were "truly back to normal."

As if.

Anyhow, the one thing that is always in session: the tacky. The following ties are all new--to me, at least.





In order, thanks to Ben Leierer, Matthew Stidham, and Danny Stohr.

the final fashion frontier

Another donation from Daniel Grimm, worn Thursday the 20th to equal parts acclaim and horror.

100% dyed tribble fur.

whither team?

Tried a little magical thinking: I'd wear the tie, and the Mariners would bust out of their funk. Hasn't exactly worked.

picante

Tuesday's in its rookie appearance.


Thursday's, a repeat from long ago.

fashion is the law

So let's get litigious!

(Tie, if I recall correctly, compliments of Paxton Rice. On the reverse, it says, "Honest lawyer one flight up!" I guess this is a stab at self-deprecating humor.)

no fumar

Today's tie is all silk and all new, at least to me, and thanks to Ito Santamarina, who blithely wore it all around Europe, even though, in polite company, it must have garnered scorn, or, at best, severe indifference.

(All those commas 'cause we're winded.)

ride on, Curious George

In your Escheresque nightmarescape.

cardinal and golden dragons

Here's the dragon tie I would have worn this past Friday, were it not for senior Andrew Kim, who urged me to wear his football jersey instead.

Tie's origin: China. Specifically, a business trip to Hong Kong. Not by me, but my older sister. Thanks, Cath.

notes

A deranged reindeer. It is June, and he is still delivering presents. Better call the union rep.

Bland, resourceful polyester. My desensitization theory is entirely true.

steroid free

"Who would wear that tie?" a student asked.

"Hmm, maybe a D.A.R.E. officer?" I replied.

"Oh, yeah. Good point."

And we wonder why D.A.R.E. isn't working.

are you ready? I don't think you're ready.

I deliberated for two days before deciding I could show you the tie below. It took one year of ocular therapy to restore my full color vision after first seeing it, and three years of training at a Tibetan monastery to be able to withstand the color combination.

It's a little blurry, and not just for your safety. I tried several angles and distances before realizing that my poor old digital camera simply couldn't handle the shock.

I'm warning you: what you're about to see is potentially fatal to small children and the elderly. Avoid if you have a heart condition, are pregnant, or wish to enjoy the rainbow hues of life ever again.

Also, those really are hot dogs. Thank you, bro-in-law.

silk road

Imported direct from Shanghai via an old college buddy. They don't have tariff on tacky.

still life with poäng

Tacky Tie Rule #4: A holiday-themed tie may be worn on any day except the holiday.

dress like an Egyptian

Compliments of Rachel Hom (and friend--who that friend is, I can't remember, sorry), class of 2006. Originally from the Metropolitan Museum of Art gift shop, later recovered via garage sale.

Tickle Me Elmo is ready for his close-up

A few of my tacky ties are silk. Only a few.

Happy Cartoon Day, one day late.

a money tie for 80s Day

Why not? It was the Decade of Greed.